Scene: You're having a telephone conversation with a friend or family member (F/FM). All of a sudden, the reception seems to cut in and out. Your F/FM says, "Oh, hold on a second... someone else is ringing me; let me see who it is; I'll be right back." So, you wait, using up your time and your money, and, if you're like me, feeling foolish.
To me, "Call Waiting" is high on the list of the rudest inventions ever. Why is the other caller more important than me? And, conversely, why would I want to interrupt a valuable conversation with my F/FM to speak to someone else right this minute? Some who subscribe to the service justify it by claiming emergency purposes. There's a polite solution: if there is indeed an emergency, the other caller can always get the operator to break into the conversation. Or if there is a critical situation, the F/FM can inform you at the outset of your conversation that they don't want to tie up the line long because someone might be trying to reach them.
My rule is that if my F/FM doesn't come back on the line within 75 seconds, I hang up. The self-esteem I have developed doesn't permit me to be pre-empted.
And that's about all I have to say about that.
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A ringing phone is by definition an interruption. That’s why it has to ring – to call attention to itself (of course, the term “ring” is now used in a context less strict than, say, 10 to 15 years ago). When I was a child, the phone was not to be touched during specific times of the day, such as dinner time. It was to be scorned for the interruption it was. We all knew that if the call was important and from someone we knew that the caller would understand and call back later. The few who didn’t understand and dared complain were never heard from again because such inconsiderateness in supposed friends was not tolerated.
With today’s technology, not answering the phone is easier than ever. There is voice-mail, automatic forwarding, text messages, e-mail – literally dozens of ways to get a message to someone. Leaving a voice-mail is a polite, efficient way to deliver a message, ask a question, or just say hello. The fact that so many incessantly persist in all methods available until their target is contacted is a testament to the general narcissism of the current generation.
The callee may consider leaving a call unanswered rude. An unanswered call should never be interpreted as a rude gesture. After all, the caller is the one creating the interruption. An irrational need to answer a ringing phone, regardless of current activities, should be considered an obsessive compulsive disorder.
And that’s all I have to say about that. For the moment.
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